marketing is chaos. let's start with that.

marketing is chaos. let's start with that.marketing is chaos. let's start with that.marketing is chaos. let's start with that.
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For most businesses marketing is insanity.

It's nuts. Its hopeless. It's frustrating. 

Try as you might, marketing will remain a mystery as deep and unknowable as dark matter and the Bermuda Triangle. 


But still—without it, nothing moves. No marketing, no funnel, no sales. Just a sad little product floating in the void, whispering “Pick me…” into the abyss.


Oh, I know—you think you know what marketing is.
Everybody does.


But the science is in: Marketing is an unknowable entity.
It’s mist. It’s myth. It’s voodoo. It's dangerous.

Still, some of us are drawn to it.

I  find the mystery intoxicating. Maddening. Beautiful.

I've chosen a life of servitude to the gods of marketing—
fickle, humorless beings who change the rules on a whim.

"John settled the chaos for us."

As a growing tech company, there’s no way we could handle marketing on our own. It was overwhelming—until John stepped in. He took it off our backs and made it work. Over three years we grew an average 29% YOY with John as our FCMO.

Mike Elness, Founder, ELDR

Marketing lives in motion. In nuance.

It lives in that twitchy space between logic and instinct.

It’s part science, part spell-casting.  If you pick it up and try to do it yourself, it will bite you like a Blue Heeler with a wasp up its butt. Better to just set it down and back away slowly. 

Still, someone has to step in there.

Without someone leading marketing you'll have zero leads. Someone else will eat your market share. And we can't let that happen. Might as well pass it to someone who knows how to handle it. That's me. 

"John gets the marketing craziness."

Marketing is just too much for a mid-market business like us to handle on our own. But hiring an agency? Too expensive. As a Fractional Marketing Leader, John fits like a glove—strategic, hands-on, affordable, always pushing us forward.

John Christensen, Founder, FISH!

Contact

John.arms@voyageuru.com 

612-590-1995.

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three ways you can set it down and back away slowly.

Step-In Fractional CMO.

Step-In Fractional CMO.

Step-In Fractional CMO.

I take the lead on your marketing so you don’t have to. Strategy, story, systems—and the leads that follow.
$5K–$8K/month.

Marketing Plan.

Step-In Fractional CMO.

Step-In Fractional CMO.

In two weeks, we’ll uncover your true customer signal and build a plan around it. Customer intelligence → clear strategy → action plan.
$5K flat.

Business Backcast.

Business Backcast.

Business Backcast.

Start at December 2026. You’ve made it.
Now we reverse-engineer exactly how you got there. "Big Consulting" output without Big Consulting.
1 week. One playbook.
$2500 flat.

Contact.

Business Backcast.

Business Backcast.

John.arms@voyageuru.com 

612-590-1995.

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Why frustrate yourself with marketing?

Ready to set marketing down and back away?

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Marketing never sits still.

Marketing rarely makes sense to the observer. 

Marketing will bite you like a blue heeler. 

Pass the frustration on to me instead. 

J.P. Arms Marketing

105 Elmwood Place East, Minneapolis, MN 55419, us

(612) 590-1995 John.arms@voyageuru.com

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